Curiosity's Dance Partner

Curiosity has a dance partner in our life's symphony of self-discovery, learning and connection with others - and it really isn't that surprising.

As a child, I've always had a healthy sense of intellectual curiosity; wanting to know how the world works, drowning myself in hours of reading, book after book. I was never seemingly able to quench this thirst of wanting to know more, not just because I wanted to but also because I could.

When we are curious, we open up our minds (and hearts) to endless possibility. We shift our mindset towards growth and learning. We form deeper connections with others through seeking to know them and empathising with them. However, curiosity alone is not enough - for people to be willing to open up to us, there needs to be humility.

Humility, in my opinion, is a state of being. It is freedom from arrogance or self-importance. It's being vulnerable and revealing that we don't know all the answers. It's setting aside pre-conceived notions or personal agendas to truly listen and be with the person you're with. You see the person and acknowledge the whole of them - their heart (feelings and emotions), their mind (focus and intellect), their body (desires and pain), and their spirit (values and beliefs).

Humility is a state of being. It is freedom from arrogance or self-importance.

curiosity and humility in coaching

While curiosity comes naturally to me, I've had my struggles with humility since childhood - finding the 'appropriate' way to showcase my abilities or giving advice to others without coming across as self-promoting or pompous. With coaching - yes, coaches have coaches too - I've learnt how to be a better version of myself through humility in self-awareness on how my 'conscious arrogance' would serve me and others in the situation. I have applied this in my conversations and it has had a tremendous impact on my relationships with others.

Being curious with my coachees creates a safe and courageous space for them to unpack experiences to uncover learnings and empower their naturally creative and resourceful self into action. Imagine a coaching conversation - or any conversation for that matter - where there is curiosity without humility; most of us would have found the other person judgemental, arrogant or even nosy!

With curiosity and humility present, the conversation shifts to a place of common understanding and mutual trust with a shared commitment to speak the truth with empathy. As a curious life coach, my promise to my coachees is simple - our coaching relationship would be a collaborative one empowered by curiosity and humility. Every conversation would be a dance of possibilities, as partners taking turns leading each other in a shared symphony of learning and discovery.

My humble invitation to you - may I have this dance?

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